I lit up when Meredith told me I could come inside. I probably should have learned to hide my emotions, but then, I’d never really had to before. In fact, my experience so far had taught me much the opposite. Men were so easily manipulated by a fallen tear or a flash-bulb smile. I’d never had to learn to play the male games, hadn’t done the corporate life, ever. I was smart and I never dumbed myself down for anyone, especially my husband, but that didn’t mean that I didn’t play the game by female rules.
But that put me at a disadvantage for the first time in my life. Meredith didn’t love me, she wasn’t wooing me, this was something very, very different. Her hand shot out again and blocked the door just before I ran through.
“I’ve just realized,” she said, “that I’ve just paid a Hundred thirty dollars just to see you naked. That’s a lot of money, especially in Vegas. For just twenty and a couple of watered-down beers I could see a dozen women, much hotter than you, just down the street. Even counting in cab fare I don’t think the whole night would cost me more than forty and those girls really know how to turn a person on; the way they move and smile. I’ve just paid over three times that for a housewife with three kids. Does that strike you as fair?”
My brain came to a shrieking, shuddering stop. Stunned and caught off guard I didn’t know how to answer her. I couldn’t speak, my voice just gurgled up and I let out a strange little gasp, but that was all I could accomplish. Her arm felt like an iron bar holding me in the hallway.
“Does that sound fair to you?” It took me a moment to realize that Meredith wasn’t talking to me right now. The man with the ice bucket hadn’t left.
He was standing there with a dopey smile plastered across his face, his eyes darting back and forth as if he expected the doors around him to burst open at any moment. Or maybe he was looking for hidden cameras; reality tv has taken some strange turns lately.
I turned back towards him pleading silently. Big eyes, softly quivering lip. Please.
“No,” he said and he was leering now, “a hundred thirty is too expensive for a housewife.”
Suddenly I was cutely aware that I was standing in the hallway completely naked except for a pair of sparkly heels. And he’d already felt me up. I felt my face grow hot, but he wasn’t finished yet.
His wife probably nagged him to death with ‘honey -do’ lists and little errands. This was his opportunity to get back at all of us. “For that type of money the bitch should dance for you at least.”
I whipped my head back towards Meredith in time to catch her smile. “Excellent idea! Don’t you think so, slut?”
“Meredith, please–
“Please, what? Please don’t make me do this? Is that what you’re asking?” She was mocking me now. I could hear the venom in her voice. The disdain.
“No one’s made you do anything slut,” she whipped me with her voice. I could feel it curling around me, singing like leather. “You stripped out here in the hall because you wanted to. You wanted to be naked in front of me. You wanted him to see you. Do you understand that? Do you? Has it settled in deep down, into your bones? You wanted this man to see you naked, to touch your body. You wanted it. You could have refused at any time and what’s the worst that could happen? You go back to your husband, you tell him you lost some money; big fucking deal! But you didn’t. You chose not to and do you want to know why?”
I was stunned again and somehow I felt more naked listening to her words than I did standing in the hallway. She didn’t need to grip my chin and force my eyes into hers; I couldn’t have pulled them away if I’d wanted. For a brief moment I had the impression that I was falling into them, that each of those deep green eyes were tunnels that wound eventually down. I felt small, as if I were shrinking. Heartbeat by heartbeat, breath by breath I was dwindling, reducing myselfto my core like a vicious haiku.
I must have nodded or grunted or somehow indicated that I wanted her to go on. Meredith reached up and gently ran the back of two fingers down the side of my face, lightly tracing the contours of my cheek. I feel her fingers slip under my chin and lift it slightly, as if to position me for a kiss. My eyes closed in anticipation and I gently trembled. My knees weak. My body flushed with desire.
I feel her drawing closer to me. The air sang with anticipation. I didn’t breathe. I couldn’t move. I felt her breath hot against my cheek, felt her lips brush my ear even before I heard her words. “You’re a slut and you want this to happen. This is your secret fantasy, your real desire. You want this, to give in. This is the essence of surrender. And you want this, don’t you? To surrender.”
“Yes…” the words slipped across my tongue. A shiver ran down my spine.
“You want to release yourself, don’t you slut? You want to offer yourself up to me. To sacrifice yourself upon my altar? You want that, don’t you?”
“Yes and yes again.” And I did. I felt a wind whipping around inside my head. I couldn’t even hear myself speak, but I felt it. I felt the words vibrate through my body, electricity singing through my cells.
“Show me what you want to do for me slut. Dance for me. Please me.” Meredith nipped at my earlyobe, her teeth like needs piercing my skin.
Lust exploded between my thighs. I knew my lips were swollen and hot and I could feel my desire dripping from me. I turned from her and took a deep breath, my lungs sucking at the sweet air.
I shook. I twirled. I ground myself against an invisible pole. My hands covered myself and withdraw and I was not ashamed. I moved around the man, who by now had forgotten his ice bucket on the floor beside him. I heard his breath catch as I moved behind him and ran my hands over his chest and tighs. And then I moved away before he could turn into me.
I smiled and ran my fingers across my body, twisting and pinching my nipples. I smiled for Meredith and caught her eyes as I moved away from the man. I locked on her eyes, targeted her, and offered myself silently to her. I danced for her and wanted her to know it. Burned for her to know it.
I met Meredith with each thrust of my hips. Tasted her when my tongue wet my lips. I flung my arms out to her as I eclipsed the man with my body. Here I am! Take me! How could she not hear the words that echoed through my entire being? Did she know that it was her hands I felt wrapping themselves across my breasts; that ticked their way down to my sex? Could she feel me the way I feel her now?
She could. I knew she could when she smiled. Moist heat spread its way through my body. She turned and I spasmed inside.
I danced the way I’d seen the girls dance upon the stage. I filled myself with sex, let it drip and roll off of me; feel it smoke and steam as it ran across my skin.
I turned and danced for the man again. Ran my hands up my body and tangled my fingers in my hair. I ground myself against him and felt him respond through his jeans. It was hard and rough against my naked sex. He gasped and reached for me, but I danced away, laughing.
I was Aphrodite. I was a temple whore. I could feel the lust thick and heavy in the air, filling the hallway like incense. Music swirled around me, throbbing with animal rhythm. It came from inside; race-memory etched deep into my cells. Nothing existed but the dance, the swirling movement, the heat that built up inside.
I turned back towards my goddess. Meredith. Nothing existed for me at that moment, but her. I stepped towards her, languid and dripping. Dropping to my knees before her. To the floor. Nipples brushing against the rough fibers of the carpet. Spreading myself across the floor for her. Surrender.
END PART TWO
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