Kim stood on the top run of a small step ladder, dusting the shelves which held the magazines. She had worked in the newsagents for 3 months now. She worked from 7am to 7pm to support her ailing husband who had not worked for months. They were long hours but the work wasn’t hard. He boss Bill was a pleasant employee he mostly left her to her own devices. The newsagents didn’t need additional staff. Her eyes swept the women’s magazines as she dusted.
“Get your libido back after menupause!” She smiled that wasn’t her problem. Her libido was something which she didn’t needed to regain but repress.
“How to make him a tiger in the bedroom” she giggled to herself. Imagining herself in sexy undies, paralleling in front of her husband. He probably wouldn’t even notice. His interest in her extended to what’s on the TV and what’s for dinner. Sex was infrequent, boring and left her cold and unsatisfied. Her eyes travelled across the top shelf. Every type of porn, for every taste. Wank fodder for men. She served these customers without judgement and did her best to relieve their embarrassment. She knew too well their need and shared their addition.
She must have been poised staring at the top row of magazines when he came into the shop. Scanning the big breasted, nuclear young women. The buff men. Reading the banners which proclaimed prolific sexual activity. She heard him place the coffee cup down on the counter. It jolted her and she looked over at him. Maybe guilt or shade coloured her cheeks but she felt her blush spread across her face. Like a precious school girl, caught behind the bike sheds with some young man’s hand in her knickers.
He walked across the shop to her. Bill was a little older then her and a calm controlled man whose wife had died some years ago. He had the most intense eyes which seemed to hold her gaze just a little too long. He didn’t make her feel uncomfortable, but she felt like he was searching her face for something. The way his eyes travelled over her body, lingered on her breasts, caressed her legs, sometimes brought her out in goose bumps. She had no idea why as he’d only ever treated her with the upmost respect.
He reached up and took an adult magazine off the top shelf, flicked the pages casually.
“You know Kim, you can read any magazine you wish. As long as your work is done, you don’t damage them and their put back afterwards. These plastic looking women do nothing for me” he said “I prefer curves, real women, with real bodies”.
Just for a second she could swear he turned up at her! She didn’t know what to say. So she said nothing and just watched him walk away into his living quarters behind the shop. For some inexplicable reason she realized she was shaking.
Bill always went into town on a Thursday afternoon. Banked the takings. Attended to his business. For some reason Thursday afternoon were always quiet. She was lucky if she had 2 customers until the kids come home from school.
She flicked through the newspaper but her glance returned to the magazine she long to look at. She wondered if she dared. She stretched up and retrieved the fetish magazine which fascinated her. For some time now she had been attracted to BDSM. She spent time on the internet looking at D/s stories. They excited and intrigued her. She tentively explored this new world and ever ventured into fetish chartrooms, Where she mostly sat on the sides watching the various interactions. She placed the magazine on the counter. Her eyes feasted on the pictures. She read snippets.
She found a quiz. “Are you a submissive, a slut or a slave? 50 questions to test your sexuality”. Why not she thought. See what the test made of the things which constantly swirled round her head. The fans which became more detailed the more she explored. The stories which made her wet. She got a blank piece of paper not able to write in the book. She began to read the questions and write the answers on the piece of paper. They asked about her sexual experience her fans, sexual acts ached to explore, her aversions. She concentrated on her answers, wanting some answers of her own to what she needed, desired, but couldn’t name.
She was aware of a presence before she looked up. She was so surprised to see Bill standing there the magazine went flying onto the floor and landed at his feet. Bill bent down and picked it up.
“I…I……” Kim stuttered on her words. Mortified he had found her reading porn, never mind filling in a BDSM questionnaire. Bill held out his hand.
” Give me that” he said indicating the piece of paper where she’d written her answers. She hesitated, thought about ripping it up and throwing it into the bin
“Kim” his voice was smooth, firm, commanding” Give me the piece of paper in your hand”. She passed it over speechless convinced this is where she got the sack.
“Good girl ” he almost whispered. His gaze held hers so powerfully she couldn’t blink.
“Never be afraid of your sexuality Kim, it’s who you are”. He turned and walked away. Kim realized that during this exchange she was holding her breath, that her nipples had tightened and that if he compared the answers on the paper to the questions in the magazine he’d know more about her sexually than any other man.
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